From the Romans through to Freud, our fave gal, the clitoris, has had a bloody hard time throughout history. Most of which, you probably have no clue about (don’t worry, we didn’t either). Here’s the history lesson we all should’ve got in school.

Timeline

1001

The Romans

Dismissing the clitoris as the female body’s failed attempt at a penis. What did the Romans ever do for us anyway?

1400

If the broom fits, ride it.

In the 1400’s, our fave gal the clitoris got a fancy new name, becoming the “devil’s teat”, any woman with one was to be burned at the stake for her witchcraft. If the broom fits…

1545

Shameful Member

Some French guy dissected the clit for the first time eva, a good move you might say. Nope, he labelled it our “shameful member”, cheers mate.

1827

Female Hysteria

“Female hysteria” ran rampant (not like the rabbit) throughout the UK, women everywhere were reported as having sexual desires. How better to deal with this situation than to make up an illness?

1841

Give it a rub or cut it off

There were only two possible solutions to this madness, give it a rub or cut it off, obviously. That’s right, doctor’s took to either “manually massaging hysterical women” or “surgically removing the clitoris”. At least it sounds like men in the 1800’s could find it.

1849

The Manipulator

Much like the men of 2019, doctors found all this clitoral stimulation, tiring and time-consuming, and many complained of sore wrists. And so, “The Manipulator” was born, the world’s first vibrator.

1904

Fuck You Freud

Our “mate” Freud made sex all about penetration. Yep, in out in out in out… Yawn. Sadly, the Western World adopted all of his fucked up thinking with no questions asked. So, forget your “amputated penis” (that’s the clitoris with 8,000 nerve endings to you and me) have a vaginal orgasm to tick the real woman box.

1948

Gray’s Anatomy

The clitoris was completely erased from the world’s leading textbook on human anatomy. Your guess is as good as ours.

1953

Kinsey

Turns out not all men are arseholes, Alfred Kinsey found that penetration isn’t actually the be all and end all, putting the clitoris back on the map.